I Have the Hots for Too Many Fictional Characters

[anogete]

falco_conlon made me do it. I swear.

List fifteen fictional characters, male or female, who you would have sex with (in no particular order) and tag 5 people to do the same.

01. Jet Black from Cowboy Bebop

I don't even think I can own up to the ridiculous amount of attraction I have for Jet. I lust after him so hard. And, he is the only character on this list I actually think I would mesh with in real life. Well, if he were real and all. For those not in the know, he is a retired police officer who works as a bounty hunter, tends bonsai, and enjoys cooking.

02. Drasek Riven from The Erevis Cale Novels
I don't have an image for his one because he's from a book and people need to get on the fanart of him before I implode. He's an assassin with a missing eye and a perpetual sneer on his face. Riven is extremely good at what he does and very pragmatic. If killing your grandma would serve his best interest, then he'll do it. He is also a follower of Mask, the Lord of Shadows, which give him lots of nifty powers like: speaking in a black tongue that cripples those who can hear and healing abilities. I would say that he would totally kill me if I ever got a chance in bed with him, but he seems to have a healthy appetite for prostitutes, and they're all still alive.

03. Guy of Gisborne from Robin Hood (BBC)

So, I have a thing for bad boys. I haven't seen all of the second season, but I know what happens in the last episode, so don't feel sorry for me since I don't know what a bastard he is just yet. I'm aware. I still adore him. He work for the deliciously evil Sheriff of Nottingham and desires power above nearly everything else. He and Robin Hood have a wonderful rivalry going on, and if I were a slasher... Well, I'm not, but you could make some hate!sex out of that.

04. Walter Skinner from The X-Files

Holy crap, Skinner. When I was thirteen, I had a crush on Mulder. When I was fourteen, I had a crush on Krycek. When I was sixteen, I had a crush on Skinner. I still have a crush on Skinner. He's an Assistant Director of the FBI and directly in charge of Mulder and Scully. He's also the strong, silent type, and I get off on that so much that it's sick. Plus, there was that scene in "Tunguska" when he comes to the door shirtless and roughs up Krycek on his apartment balcony... Yum...

05. Jarlaxle Baenre from D&D, TSR, Forgotten Realms, WoTC, what-the-fuck-ever

Anyone who has read anything with Jarlaxle in it knows he's a pimp. Not only is he the smoothest and most fashionable Dark Elf, but he's the smoothest and most fashionable person/creature ever. He's a self-made man/elf with a huge organization of mercenaries he controls. His lust for power and pretty girls urged him into ascending to the surface world where he's doing quite well. He has mad skills with the weapons, and a wicked sense of humor. And, despite being able to kill you with a flick of his wrist, he'd probably rather sleep with you.

06. Severus Snape from Harry Potter

I have at least six shirts with Snape's name in some form or another, so I don't think I can deny my love of this character. He's so wonderfully written, that (despite the glaring evidence in the text of his complete unattractiveness) he'd probably be on several to-do lists from my flist. I'm a sucker for the tortured almost-bad-boy who secretly just wants to be loved.

07. Malcolm Reynolds from Firefly

Come on... just look at the wardrobe. How could I not want to do that? I have love for Jayne and Wash and even Simon, but my heart will always be Mal's. His gruff, yet caring, demeanor just make my motor run. And for those not familiar with the series, he's the captain of a spaceship and does mercenary work.

08. Altair from Assassin's Creed

This one is going to be super shallow because I've actually never played the video game. I've only watched a few YouTube clips from the game, mostly the CGI explanatory sequences that further the game progress. At any rate, he's an assassin, and I've already shown that I have a weakness for assassins. Plus, look how pretty he is....

09. Batou from Ghost in the Shell

Strong... silent... type. I can't help it! I've loved him from the beginning when I saw the first GitS movie. He had horrible hair back then, but I was still drawn to him. Then they released the second film (Innocence), and I was panting from the hotness and angst. And the fact that he owns a basset hound that he babies. Plus, his unrequited love for Motoko kills me, especially in the two seasons of the series. Batou's body is artificial, though he is a real person, not a cyborg. He works as second-in-command of an elite team of anti-terrorist operatives.

10. Mr. Darcy from Pride and Prejudice

I don't even think the actor who plays Mr. Darcy matters. Although, Matthew Macfadyen looks particularly nice in this screen capture. I also loved Colin Firth's version of the character, but so did every other female on the planet Earth. Everyone wants to sleep with Mr. Darcy. Right?

11. Alucard from Hellsing

I haven't seen the OVA yet, so I'm just basing this off the anime series and the manga. I had to have a vampire on the list because I've loved vampires since before I thought of them as sexual creatures. Plus, I adore Alucard's oddly flirtatious relationship with Integra, who I originally thought to be a man. Alucard is one of the oldest vampires and works for Integra, a young woman who runs the Hellsing organization. Her mission is to rid the world of vampires. Alucard thinks of lesser vampires as scum. He has a huge ego and loves to taunt his opponents by giving them opportunities to kill him before he does them in.

12. Lucas Buck from American Gothic

Gary Cole played the crap out of this character. He created the most interesting, devious, evil character who you still love because he is noble and fair in his own twisted way. For those of you unfamiliar with the series, it was about a young boy who is struggling between the powers of good and evil. The ghost of his dead sister is attempting to keep him in the light, while the sheriff of his small town (Lucas Buck, also secretly his father) is attempting to turn him to the darker side. I believe the intention of the series was to present Lucas as a devil. He has powers beyond that of a mere man, and he seems to know much more than anyone should. Plus, he's beyond bad-ass.

13. Richard B. Riddick from Pitch Black

If I can be so picky, then I'd like to specify Riddick from Pitch Black, not from The Chronicles of Riddick. The latter movie was fine and dandy, but it in no way compares to the masterpiece that is Pitch Black. Vin, I appreciate your enthusiasm for the project, but scale that sucker down just a bit. Anyway, Riddick is a convict and extremely dangerous. He originally declares that he only wishes to save himself from the creatures on an uninhabited planet, but he eventually goes out of his way to begrudgingly save several people. He's a classic anti-hero, and I love him for it.

14. Al Swearengen from Deadwood

No, no I do not know what I was thinking when I added him to this list. He whores women out and then beats them when they question him. He's a drunk with an unending misogynistic streak and filthy mouth. However, he is the coolest character on Deadwood, and the series would be nothing without him. By the end of the third season, he was a certified anti-hero who stuck up for those in the town unable to protect themselves. Plus his dialogue is so fast and terribly witty/intelligent that my head spins.

15. Harry Dresden from The Harry Dresden Novels

How can you not love a socially inept wizard? Jim Butcher has done such a great job with these novels that Harry feels like a real person to me. He lives in our world, but he's also a real wizard with a load of problems and even more bad luck. I adore his interactions with Murphy. It's so Mulder/Scully with a hint of romantic interest.

As for tagging people - I would like to see all of my flist do this. I'm curious as to who you would put in the fifteen slots. Pretty please? I promise to comment about your character-love.

Comments

[falco-conlon.livejournal.com]

ZOMG RIDDICK! Damn he is so sexy in Pitch Black.

[anogete.livejournal.com]

Uh, *word*. That first bit where he is talking about being in cryosleep and being animalistic. I feel like melting into a puddle in the floor and telling him to just go ahead and cuff me so he can have his way.

[keladry_lupin]

Fifteen?! I'll have to give it some thought; I can barely conjure five in my mind. (Which means that in about two hours, I'll be paring the list down from thirty.)

[anogete.livejournal.com]

Ha! That's exactly what I thought. Fifteen is quite a bit, but sure enough I was paring it down from twice that many by the time I really started thinking about it.

[bleedtoblue.livejournal.com]

That's really a grand list. I'd have to add Captain Jack from Torchwood. I don't know if I can think of fifteen characters but I'll give it a shot.

[bleedtoblue.livejournal.com]

And! Rufus..I love that song. Chaka Khan!

[m-ravensblood.livejournal.com]

No Jack Of All Trades? ;) LOL Fun meme I might snag it later tonight :D

[fredericks.livejournal.com]

Harry is MINE, lady.

Damn. I so have to do this meme now. And you'll have me Googling images too. ::grumble, grumble::

[anogete.livejournal.com]

I'm thinking we need to come up with a way of creating and then cloning fictional characters. The moral aspect would be a bit iffy, but the fangirls would be super happy.

[protect-vester.livejournal.com]

I see a running theme of either dark hair or no hair at all.... XD

Darn, now you have me wanting to do this!!

[anogete.livejournal.com]

I know! I realized that after I posted it. I'm so predictable.

[theredzebra1.livejournal.com]

Alucard! When he calls Integra "My Master" I want to melt. (totally thought Integra was a man in the beginning too) And his shape-shifting abilities more than make up for possibly killing you in a gory geyser of blood.

[anogete.livejournal.com]

The shape-shifting abilities have some serious possibilities. I think I read a fic a while back in which he used the ability in a very nasty sort of way. Naughty Alucard.