Uggg

For the record, pap smears suck. Even the term "pap smear" makes me uncomfortable. The hoops I must jump through to obtain birth control.

Car Parts, Bottles, and Cutlery

I’ve never heard a song that better conveys the notion of longing, of reckless abandon barely held in check. At the risk of sounding trite, I’m feeling this song.

We live on a mountain, right at the top
There’s a beautiful view from the top of the mountain
Every morning I walk towards the edge and throw little things off
Like car parts, bottles and cutlery or whatever I find lying around

It’s become a habit, a way to start the day

I go through all this before you wake up
So I can feel happier to be safe up here with you

It’s real early morning, no-one is awake
I’m back at my cliff still throwing things off
I listen to the sounds they make on their way down
I follow with my eyes ‘til they crash
Imagine what my body would sound like slamming against those rocks

When it lands will my eyes be closed or open?

I go through this before you wake up
So I can feel happier to be safe up here with you

I feel like I should thank Bjork for writing the damn thing. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I might be another step closer to understanding the parts of myself that I’m actually afraid of knowing. All it took was a metaphor.